A Fuckin’ Angel!

There are all kinds of angels.  Guardian angels.  Fallen angels.  Anaheim Angels.

Me?  I’m a fuckin’ angel.  How do I know?  My friend told me so.  A fuckin’ angel!

© 2014 Jaclyn Schrier. All rights reserved.

Advertisements

Shake, Rattle, and Roll

The clock said 3:17 am.  Despite enough sleeping pills to take down a T-Rex, I, like the animals, farm and pet, awoke a few minutes before the initial rumblings.

For just a moment, I thought it was the man upstairs.  His wife is away and he is having some kind of bed-breaking sex with someone who is not his wife.

I mean, it is worse than some Triple XXX movie in Sensurround.  The springs creaking.  The walls banging.  I was just about to get the stepladder and broom when my own bed started to tremble.

There is something unmistakable about an earthquake.  The way it comes up from below.  Nothing else feels like it.  This was a 6.0, the biggest since I’ve been in California.

Even so, it fell quite a bit short of the magnitude of my neighbor’s rocking and knocking.  I really hope his wife gets back soon.

© 2014 Jaclyn Schrier. All rights reserved.